More Shud

This past Saturday Night Live was the best I’ve seen in quite a while. SNL is actually one of the very few shows I’ll turn on the TV to watch, but it’s been disappointing lately.

This week it was really pretty funny. I liked the opener (about Trump and an alien invasion), the Olive Garden commercial was pretty good, and the mermaid sketch featuring Kate McKinnon as ‘Shud’ (who is part blobfish) and Scarlett Johansson as her best friend the anglerfish was hilarious.

I hope they keep going with this skit. Maybe they can even add Leslie Jones in there somewhere. I think she might add even more to it. 🙂

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Songs of the Sea: Pirate Chantey

In honor of Pirates Weekend at the Texas Renaissance Fair, I’m re-posting this little ditty from last year.

Here’s another little sea chantey to add to your musical collection. It’s done by Key & Peele, 2 funny guys who used to be on MADtv (which I loved). I really used to love MAD magazine when I was a kid, but the ones they’re coming out with now are nowhere near as funny as they used to be (and no, it’s not just because I’m getting older!).

This sketch somehow manages to be both a little risque’ and PC at the same time. 😉

Pirate Chantey– Key & Peele

“Thar once was a lass so fine,
She was drunk on Barleywine,
I’d been (out) to sea for a month or three,
I knew I could make her mine.
But the lass was past consent,
So it was off with her we went,
And we threw her in bed and we rested her head,
And we left cuz that’s what Gentlemen do…

A woman has a right to a drink or two,
Without worryin’ about what you will do!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’ 
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

Thar once was a girl from Leeds,
Who I heard was good on her knees,
So I docked my ship for an overnight trip,
To take care of all of my needs.
She was fine as the tales did tell,
And my mast began to swell,
So I laid her down and I raised her gown,
And performed cunnilingus for an hour or so.

Always take care of yer lady fair,
Cuz they deserve as much attention down there!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

I once had a woman so fair,
Whose whom contained my heir,
With a son by my side, the seas we’d ride,
The child she would bear.
But my woman she was no fool,
She was working her way through school,
So I did support when she chose to abort,
Because it’s her body and therefor her choice.

No we don’t say ‘booty’ ‘less we talkin’ ’bout gold,
and we don’t look at chests ‘less they’s treasure-holds!
With a hat and a feather and a cutlass on our hip,
We don’t say ‘she’ when we’re talking ’bout a ship!
We don’t say ‘bitch’ and we don’t say ‘whore,’
Cuz that language leads to things like body dysmorphia.

Thar was a lady with a golden eye,
And the doctor said she would die,
So she emptied her purse to lift the curse,
And prayed to stay alive.
She awoke the very next day,
And in her grave she lay,
But the scariest part of the story from the start,
Is I bet you assumed the doctor was a man.

Women are doctors too,
And for a fraction of the doubloons!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

Thar was a slut with tits to here, and an ass that- (gunshot. he is dead and that is good.)

Cuz it’s Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.”

True Tales of the Sea

Time for some funnies. I just watched this (again) on Saturday Night Live. That’s one of the very few shows I’ll turn on the TV for. It’s still funny, so sharing. 🙂

Star Trek Parody-Carol Burnett Show

Source: Star Trek Parody-Carol Burnett Show

 

That was hilarious! I laughed so hard. Do yourself a favor and take a look.

Thanks to Ascendingstarseed for sharing.

Songs of the Sea: Pirate Chantey

Here’s another little sea chantey to add to your musical collection. It’s done by Key & Peele, 2 funny guys who used to be on MADtv (which I loved). I really used to love MAD magazine when I was a kid, but the ones they’re coming out with now are nowhere near as funny as they used to be (and no, it’s not just because I’m getting older!).

This sketch somehow manages to be both a little risque’ and PC at the same time. 😉

Pirate Chantey– Key & Peele

“Thar once was a lass so fine,
She was drunk on Barleywine,
I’d been (out) to sea for a month or three,
I knew I could make her mine.
But the lass was past consent,
So it was off with her we went,
And we threw her in bed and we rested her head,
And we left cuz that’s what Gentlemen do…

A woman has a right to a drink or two,
Without worryin’ about what you will do!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

Thar once was a girl from Leeds,
Who I heard was good on her knees,
So I docked my ship for an overnight trip,
To take care of all of my needs.
She was fine as the tales did tell,
And my mast began to swell,
So I laid her down and I raised her gown,
And performed cunnilingus for an hour or so.

Always take care of yer lady fair,
Cuz they deserve as much attention down there!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

I once had a woman so fair,
Whose whom contained my heir,
With a son by my side, the seas we’d ride,
The child she would bear.
But my woman she was no fool,
She was working her way through school,
So I did support when she chose to abort,
Because it’s her body and therefor her choice.

No we don’t say ‘booty’ ‘less we talkin’ ’bout gold,
and we don’t look at chests ‘less they’s treasure-holds!
With a hat and a feather and a cutlass on our hip,
We don’t say ‘she’ when we’re talking ’bout a ship!
We don’t say ‘bitch’ and we don’t say ‘whore,’
Cuz that language leads to things like body dysmorphia.

Thar was a lady with a golden eye,
And the doctor said she would die,
So she emptied her purse to lift the curse,
And prayed to stay alive.
She awoke the very next day,
And in her grave she lay,
But the scariest part of the story from the start,
Is I bet you assumed the doctor was a man.

Women are doctors too,
And for a fraction of the doubloons!
We say Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.

Thar was a slut with tits to here, and an ass that- (gunshot. he is dead and that is good.)

Cuz it’s Yo-HO but we don’t say ‘ho,’
Cuz ‘ho’ is disrespectful, yo.”

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (Movie Review)

I don’t watch all that many movies. But when I’ve got a long plane ride, I might watch one or two. I usually have a hard time finding one I think will be worth the time. Since I can never sleep unless I’m lying down (or I’ve been up for over 24 hours and just too exhausted to stay awake any longer), I’m apt to try out  the in flight ‘entertainment system’ on the plane.

My flight home from Luanda to Frankfurt was 8 1/2 hours long. Then I had another 10 1/2 hour flight from Frankfurt to Houston. I didn’t really see ANYTHING worth watching at first glance. I flipped through the choices again and again, searching for something to keep my mind occupied (the book I was reading just wasn’t holding my interest).

I finally decided to try this film. It’s not something I usually would have watched. I usually prefer science fiction/fantasy, horror, or really silly comedy. (I also watched the ‘Dawn of the Planet of the Apes’ this trip home.)

I’m glad I did decide to watch the ‘Best Exotic Marigold Hotel’. It really was pretty funny. Not in an ‘in-your-face’ kind of way, but in a more subtle kind of way.

The idea behind it- of a fantastic retirement home in a faraway, exotic, cheap and affordable location- was very interesting to me. I’ve been looking for that myself in real life. I watched the movie to see how the characters dealt with the different things they’d come across in daily life in a foreign country.

I loved the movie. The actors, (Judi Dench, Celia Imrie, Bill Nighy, Ronald Pickup, Maggie Smith, Tom Wilkinson, Penelope Wilton and Dev Patel), all did a great job. I especially loved the way Muriel (Maggie Smith) grew into her new life. The director (John Madden) found the perfect settings and put it all together in a wonderful way. I really enjoyed myself. I laughed a lot, I even cried a couple of times. I’ve always wanted to visit India and this film has given me even more reasons to go. 🙂

I have a couple of friends I really hope I can get to watch this movie. I’d recommend it to anyone who likes an adventure, travel, learning new things, new cultures, about life, about yourself. I thought it was very inspiring and worth sharing.

Let me know if you’ve seen it already and what you thought.

Movie Review: Tammy

I watched a couple of movies on the flight over here today. One of them was pretty funny. It’s not really the kind of thing I normally would choose to watch. For instance, last time I watched the Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. 😉

This one starred Melissa McCarthy and Susan Sarandon. Kathy Bates had a good part in it too. It started out when Tammy (Melissa McCarthy) ran into a deer on the way to work and lost her job over it. She has quite the attitude. 😉

Susan Sarandon plays her grandmother who wants to take a road trip to Niagara Falls before she dies.

I don’t want to give too much away, but I was cracking up laughing through the whole thing. Here’s a trailer…

Just in case- there is some cussing in there. 😉

Comedy: Steve Hughes

I got an email earlier today from the Dollar Vigilante (I subscribe). He was talking about how we need to find ways to get more people to wake up, to see what’s really going on around them, to get involved.

It’s funny cause I was just suggesting the same thing at the Campaign for Liberty meetings I go to Tuesday nights when I’m home. How maybe we could try to use movies, videos and COMEDY to catch peoples attention.

At least long enough for us to start a conversation. Hopefully the comics would at least open their minds and get them thinking just a little bit out of the ordinary. Then maybe we could open it a little bit further. I was thinking along the lines of George Carlin (who was also in the TDV video).

I never heard of this guy Steve Hughes before. He’s from Australia. In the video he says he lives in England now. He’s doing a show in Sweden (Swedish subtitles). I think he’s pretty funny in this show. I also think he says a lot of things that OUGHT to make people THINK. I like that. 🙂

I especially liked it when he started up about second hand smoking. Check it out. 🙂

PS- If profanity REALLY offends you, maybe you ought to think twice, he does use cuss words.

SNL: Obama Addresses Putin

He has got his Obama impression DOWN! 🙂

SNL still comes up with some good stuff sometimes.;-)

Video: Female Sea Captains

A friend sent this to me the other day. I just got around to watching it. My computer is very slow and I’ve been really busy so it took a while. She figured I might like it since I’m a female sea captain. She was right, thanks J.! 🙂

It’s a sketch from Saturday Night Live (SNL). A whaling town has an epidemic that wipes out all the male sea captains and so the women take over the jobs. They have to avoid the mermen and find the white whale, with a few ‘she shanties’ sung along the way.

Well, no, it’s not as good as some of the real classic SNL skits, but it’s good for a few laughs, and after all, I really am a female sea captain. 😉

http://www.hulu.com/watch/560124

Maritime Monday for September 30th, 2013: Movies About Sailors Part 5; Sailor’s Luck

Maritime Monday for September 30th, 2013: Movies About Sailors Part 5; Sailor’s Luck | gCaptain

Yeah, I know I’m late. 😉 I’ve been so busy, I’m falling WAY behind in my emails, etc. I had hoped to be able to catch up a little bit this weekend but STILL just SO busy. I’ve only got a couple of days before I have to go back offshore and not sure what kind of access I’ll have to the internet, so trying to post a few now to keep my loyal followers happy. 😉

Here’s another from Monkey Fists’ great series on Maritime Movies. Movies About Sailors Part 5: Sailor’s Luck looks like another great batch of movies to while away a lazy afternoon.

I haven’t seen ANY of these movies which seems like something I’ll need to fix one of these days. Some of them look pretty good. I would like to watch the Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea starring Kris Kristofferson and the Sand Pebbles starring Steve McQueen (he got an Academy Award nomination for this role).

Some of the other movies look pretty good too, like Sinbad the Sailor with Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., Anthony Quinn and Maureen O’Hara. Should Sailors Marry? starring Clyde Cook looks interesting. Of course Sex and the Single Sailor would be high on the list. 😉

I hope Monkey Fist continues to come out with these great posts of maritime related movies. I’m saving them so if I ever do get some time to just relax one of these days, I’ll be able to just look back at my old posts and find the perfect one for my mood. Adventure, romance, comedy, drama, its all there. I hope some of you will get a chance to watch soon. I think it’ll be a while for me. Enjoy! 🙂

Maritime Monday for September 23rd, 2013: Movies About Sailors, Part IV

Maritime Monday for September 23rd, 2013: Movies About Sailors, Part IV; The Navy Comes Through | gCaptain ⚓ Maritime & Offshore News.

Part IV of Monkey Fists great series on maritime movies, this one has a lot of Navy related movies.

Everything from comedies like McHale’s Navy (Ernest Borgnine, Tim Conway) and The Navigator (Buster Keaton) and musicals like On the Town (Gene Kelly and Frank Sinatra) to drama and suspense (Riddle of the Sands based on the novel by Erskine Childers). There’s bound to be something for everyone.

There’s almost two dozen movies to choose from. Take a break and check it out. 😉

Maritime Monday for September 16th, 2013: Movies About Sailors, Part III

Maritime Monday for September 16th, 2013: Movies About Sailors, Part III; Man the Laff Boats! | gCaptain

Here’s part III in Monkey Fists’ series for gcaptain on movies about sailors. This one looks especially good cause there are so many comedies. I LOVE comedies! Especially ‘stupid’ funny, like the Three Stooges, Abbott and Costello, the Marx Brothers, “I Love Lucy”, etc.

There are a couple of movies by Abbott and Costello and Laurel and Hardy, and even a little history on Popeye at the end. Its not all about the comedy tho, there are some pretty interesting other films in this one too. Try “John Paul Jones” starring Robert Stack, “The Lady from Shanghai” starring Orson Welles and Rita Hayworth, “The Last Detail” with Jack Nicholson.

It looks like a lot of really good choices this week. Good way to spend a rainy day, Maritime Monday Movies. 😉

Zombies, Celebrity Sideboobs, and Smart Social Commentary = Web Gold

Zombies, Celebrity Sideboobs, and Smart Social Commentary = Web Gold | Mother Jones.

Just found out about this in an email from Mother Jones. 🙂 I used to get Cracked sometimes when I was a kid. I much preferred Mad magazine, but would read Cracked if it was around. I didn’t know it was on the web, never thought to check.

Here it is…www.cracked.com. It looks like its grown up a bit but still looks to be very entertaining. In the MJ interview, they mention they are now ‘one of the webs most popular humor destinations.’

I’ll be checking up on them for sure. I really like their agenda, ‘train yourself to question everything.’ Yeah, definitely my kind of people there. 😉