Song of the Sea: Good Ship Venus

Here’s another randy, dandy, old sea shanty. 😉

Good Ship Venus“, also known as “Friggin’ in the Riggin'” is a little nasty, so if you’re easily offended, you might want to pass on this one. But it’s one of my favorite drinking songs.

I didn’t know this til I looked up the lyrics to post here, but this song was done by the Sex Pistols and actually got to #3 on the charts in the UK. Anthrax also did a version. Somehow, I don’t think it would make the charts here in the US (probably would be censored- love that freedom we have so much of here).

 Good Ship Venus- Loudon Wainwright

We sailed upon the good ship Venus
By Christ you should have seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
The mast an upright penis

The captain’s name was Lugger
By Christ he was a bugger
He wasn’t fit to shovel shit
From one ship to another

And the second mate was Andy
By Christ he had a dandy
Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock
For cumming in the brandy

The third mate’s name was Morgan
By God he was a gorgon
From half past eight he played till late
Upon the captain’s organ

The captain’s wife was Mabel
And by God was she able
The crew, those shits, nailed her tits
Right to the mess room table

The captain’s daughter Charlotte
Was born and bred a harlot
Her thighs at night were lily white
By morning they were scarlet

The cabin boy was Kipper
By Christ he was a nipper
He stuffed his ass with broken glass
And circumcised the skipper

The captain’s lovely daughter
Liked swimming in the water
Delighted squeals came when some eels
Found her sexual quarters

The cook his name was Freeman
And he was a dirty demon
And he fed the crew on menstrual stew
And hymens fried in semen

And the ship’s dog was called Rover
And we turned the poor thing over
And ground and ground that faithful hound
From Teneriff to Dover

When we reached our station
Through skillful navigation
The ship got sunk in a wave of spunk
From too much fornication

On the good ship Venus
By Christ you should have seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
Sucking a dead man’s penis

3 thoughts on “Song of the Sea: Good Ship Venus

  1. Hi Uncle Spike! Glad you liked it. 🙂
    I’m not really into the Sex Pistols (punk, heavy metal, grunge, rap- not really my style- I like more mellow stuff, like reggae, folk, country, etc).
    Sorry I haven’t been around over there much. Soooooo busy just trying to keep up with it all here.


    • No worries – happy here following your adventures. I must add though that my tastes have mellowed over the decades – I was an angry, hormonal and rebellious teenager when that came out 🙂


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